Memories of New Beginnings

Its been a rough few months for me -- the job search continues, the love life is non-existent and I've been fighting the good fight to maintain a positive attitude. I've been on the short end of that battle lately. I've had a couple of glimmers of hope, when I allow myself to see them and I'm thinking that July has to be better. Anyway, in so many ways I've been asking for a new beginning in my life -- I'm coming to see a lot of parallels to where I was right before I went off to college. I was on the verge of going off in a brand new direction and I could hardly wait... I wish it had been all excitement and giddiness but then, like now, there were many times when the wait was excruciating. Recently I've had a tough time seeing past this part to the promise of what will happen next. I've gotten caught in the endless waiting and I've been searching for something that can shake me loose. And then I found it...

September 7, 1991

This is from my first football game as a Freshman at Notre Dame. I was far from home, I hadn't really made any good friends yet, and this one moment captures the magic of all the great experiences of what happened there, but reminds me of that feeling of the wonders that COULD happen, the excitement of possibilites, wonders yet to come. That's what I've been missing.