Wednesday, December 01, 2004


I know I haven't been writing much lately. Especially over the past couple of weeks, I've been pretty frustrated. I've spent the better part of a year looking for a new job and I haven't come up anything tangible yet. It's like my life has been in a big holding pattern for a quite a while... Because I went back to school and changed my life around, it's like my life has been on hold for for years. At the same time, I realized that I was trying to bring in tremendous change in my life, so I knew that it required some time and patience.

I've really been trying to shift my perspective around because I haven't been in a great mood -- it's so easy to look at the world through the lens of how things aren't how I want them to be instead of appreciating the things in my life that are right. I recently got a big reminder that things happen for a reason, which I really needed.

I've come to accept that some of the stagnation I've been feeling has been my own responsibility - I've been waiting instead of bringing in some of the changes I've wanted to make. So, this past week I've been trying to bring in some of the changes into my life of things I do have some control over.

At this point, I'm still searching and trying to open myself to possibilities that I haven't considered yet. So far it's been a tough go -- in the words of U2 - I still haven't found what I'm looking for.


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