Those Sluts!

A recent study from the Zoological Society of London finds that female cheetahs in the Serengeti have been sleeping around... a lot. Apparently, nearly half their litters have are made up with cubs with different fathers. Some scientists decry the risks of the cheetahs' immoral behavior, such as increased exposure to disease, increased dependence on welfare and social services and an overall breakdown in the cheetah moral fabric and order.

What disturbs me even more is that with Jerry Falwell no longer around, we've heard not one peep from any religious organization condemning this immoral behavior. Everyone knows that God's plan for cheetahs is built upon cheetah marriage between one male and one female... and with the male still sleeping around. But the point is that if South Africa hadn't allowed gays to marry, this probably wouldn't be happening. Where is James Dobson? Why hasn't he sounded the alarm on this important problem? Aren't cheetah families important too?