Tuesday, January 18, 2005

Don't Push!

My friend Sean asked me why I hadn't posted anything new yet. I had to answer that I haven't really had anything new to talk about. After a year of things feeling stagnant and not really making much visible progress in several areas in my life - career, relationship/love, social, etc. (though I feel like I made progress in less tangible ways in certain areas) - things are finally starting to move... though I haven't really heard anything more jobwise since I heard from that LA recruiter. I'm also still waiting to hear on that job in town. My first tendency is that I should be doing something - should be trying to follow up, etc. And at first blush, that seems like a wise thing to do. But I learned this past year that once I've played my part, things are really out of my control. I feel like that's where I am right now - I've done my part and I don't really like the feeling that I don't have any control over things, so I want to try to do something to regain some semblance of control. Of course, every time I try to do that, it seems like it just ends up driving me crazy and even slowing things down further. That's why I've been trying to focus on other things, staying in the flow, and just letting things happen. Not easy. But fortunately I can try to focus on hot guys in the gym instead. YAY!


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